The Ballestero Blog

“It’s OK To Struggle, Let Us Struggle…”

I sat the phone down slowly. My eyes were still brimming with tears. What I had just heard was heart wrenching and heart warming at the same time.

I had been talking on the phone to my oldest son Anthony and his beautiful new bride Kim. She was the former Kimberly Elrod of Piqua, OH. Her father Richard Elrod pastored there. Anthony and Kim had just gotten off their honeymoon just a few days prior.

My son had been asked to be the Youth Pastor in Jackson, MS at Bro. Tommy Craft’s church. The church had secured housing for them. It was a nice apartment that was furnished with a stove and a washer and dryer.

I knew that their small U-Haul truck did not contain much more than a bed, and a dinning room set she had purchased at a yard sale. Not much else besides personal articles and clothing. They were just starting out in life. Both had graduated from JCM only a few weeks earlier.

It dawned on me that there was no mention about a refrigerator in the house, I asked them about it on the phone. When they told me they didn’t have one, I felt desperate for them.

I had saved up about $350.00, so I volunteered to help out. I said to them, “Look, I  have some money put back, and I will send you $350.00 to buy one. You still have the U-Haul, and maybe you can find a used one in the Classifieds and use the truck to haul it.”

That’s when the sweet feminine voice of my new daughter in law piped up. She said, “No dad, don’t do that. We’re OK. Let us struggle. It’s OK to struggle!”

Emotion overwhelmed me. I cried silently. I had already fallen in love with her beauty and her talents. But I was unprepared for how beautiful her heart was. I immediately fell hopelessly in love with her sweet spirit and would then have freely given her half of my kingdom… if I’d had one.

“Well, you call me if you need me and I’ll be glad to do what I can to help!” I added.

(I couldn’t believe that there was still people like this in the world.) She was serious. She didn’t want me to intervene. They would make it, she said. Somehow they did.

The struggles in life of those you love is not easy to watch. You would love to bail everyone out of whatever mess they are in. Even when you know you can’t, you still want to.

The problem however is not always fixed if you do. When you look at nature it’s a clearer, although harsher picture.

Remember your journey to the farm when you were a kid? One of the highlights was watching baby chicks hatch. The 6 hour procedure is excruciating to observe. You see their little head hanging out. The look wet, helpless and tired. The heat lamp is keeping them warm. The shell is cracked. They’re exhausted and have to stop and rest for long periods which makes you want to help them.

If you try to help the baby chick, at best it may live 2 days. More than likely it will die sooner. I hate to say how I know that. The success of the chick’s survival is not the help, but the struggle.

Just because we are struggling in life, doesn’t mean God hates us, that we are out of His will or that our support system of loved ones has let us down.

Struggle is necessary to survival. (You’re still here aren’t you? Then don’t give up or give in.) It’s OK to struggle. The Father knows where you’re at. He’s watching. You’re going to make it!