The Ballestero Blog

The worried mother anxiously stood on the porch. What could be wrong? Why the delay? Her little girl was never this late in coming home from school. She knew to come straight home. Only something bad could cause a delay this long. Thirty minutes now seemed like an eternity.

Presently the mother saw her little darling coming toward the house. The little girl was wiping away tears with the back of her sleeve. Her eyes were red rimmed.

“What kept you? Why are you so late?” The words seemed to jump out of the Mother’s mouth. “And why are you crying?” The little girl tried to explain.

She said, “I was walking down the sidewalk with my friend and some mean boys rode by on bicycles and one of them knocked the porcelain doll out of her arms and it fell to the ground and broke.
The mother asked, “Is that why you are crying?”

“No,” said the little girl.
“Then why?” queried the mom.

“Well, when my friend saw her dolly was broken, she knelt down on the ground and tried to put it back together, but she couldn’t. So she just sat down and cried.”

“Is that why you’ve been crying?” the mom asked again.
“Not altogether!” was about all the child could say.
“Then why?” the mother again asked.

“When I saw that she couldn’t fix her dolly, I knelt down and tried to fix it, but I couldn’t fix it either. So I just sat down with her and cried too. That’s why I’ve been crying.”

This story illustrates how I have felt upon hearing the news of the passing of Janiver McClelland Brown, the loving wife of my cousin, Pastor Clayton Brown. I too had hoped against hope watching her struggle with cancer. I too have shed tears and felt at loss for words. Me, a minister, a man who uses words as tools, suddenly finds myself groping for something comforting to say. Words fail me.

I know that God gives comfort, peace and strength in trying times. But this time, I realize that I can’t fix anything. All I can do is just sit down and cry with you!

Janiver Brown… you leave a big hole in all of our hearts. No one can take your place. …

That’s why I was crying!

In Loving Memory of:
Janiver McClelland Brown,
December 25, 1956 – January 3, 2010