The Ballestero Blog

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That’s Why I’m Scared!

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That’s Why I’m Scared!

I have said in jest many times, “I ain’t scared of nothing, but I’m scared of that!” I was trying to get a laugh while talking about an uncomfortable subject or situation.

I am not a man who has phobias nor have I ever been called a fearful soul. But today I wish to reveal to my readers, that really, down deep, I’m scared.

I’m not the only one either. Remember what the Apostle Paul wrote to the church at Corinth?

1 Cor. 9:27 KJV But I keep under my body, and bring it into subjection: lest that by any means, when I have preached to others, I myself should be a castaway.

1 Cor. 9:27 ESV But I discipline my body and keep it under control, lest after preaching to others I myself should be disqualified.

  • Paul was fearful enough to be careful.
  • He was also careful enough to protect himself and prevent a personal disaster.

I have been overwhelmed this year with unbelievable stories of personal and moral failures.

I’m scared of being shipwrecked. I don’t have a problem admitting it either. I don’t have a plan ‘B’ in living for God, so plan ‘A’ has to work.

  • I refuse to be disobedient to God.
  • I refuse to rebel against Him.
  • I love Him too much to want to live without Him.

Let Me Tell You How Scared I Am!

  • I’m too scared to question God’s Word.
  • I’m too scared to take chances with holiness.
  • I’m too scared to take chances with doctrine.
  • I’m too scared to see how much of the world I can have and still be saved.
  • I’m scared of the spirit of false doctrine.
  • I’m scared of my own built-in ability to rationalize the Word of God to my own destruction.
  • I’m scared of the spirit of immorality.
  • I’m scared of the lust of the flesh.
  • I’m scared of the lust of the eye.
  • I’m scared of the pride of life.
  • I’m scared of the love of money.
  • I’m scared of pride.
  • I’m scared of getting a critical spirit.
  • I’m scared of getting bitter.
  • I’m scared not to forgive.
  • I’m scared not to love my brother.
  • I’m scared not to have the fear of God in my heart.

James wrote that a man could save himself from a horrible fate if he just wouldn’t make that first mistake.

James 1:14 But every man is tempted, when he is drawn away of his own lust, and enticed.

James 1:15 Then when lust hath conceived, it bringeth forth sin: and sin, when it is finished, bringeth forth death.

James 1:16 Do not err, my beloved brethren.

One might say, ‘Brother, you are only living for God because you are scared.”

I refer you back to Paul’s fear. He was also fearful enough that he ‘died daily’.

Like Paul, I too have invested a lifetime living for God. I’ve loved every day of living for the Lord. It has been the highest honor in the world to have labored for Him.

I have preached many thousands of sermons. Why would I want to throw a ministry away?

I have lived with the most beautiful and loving wife in the world for 45 years. Why would I want to throw that away?

I enjoy the love and respect of five married children, their spouses and thirteen grandchildren. Why would I want to throw that away?

  • I’m scared of doing anything that would disqualify me in the eyes of God.
  • I’m scared of doing anything that would disqualify me in the eyes of my wife and children.

That, my friend, is why I must keep myself under subjection every day as did Paul, that I might not become ‘disqualified.’

It would be horrible to fall this close to home! It would be horrible to become a castaway!

That’s Why I’m Scared!

Written by Martyn Ballestero

March 26, 2011 at 7:46 pm

Posted in Christian Living, Fear of God

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8 Responses

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  1. Wow what a post. Like my pastor says it’s not the first mile of the race that’s important it’s the last mile that’s the most important. I want to finish this race that is set before me.

    christopher smith

    March 26, 2011 at 9:13 pm

  2. This blog is very timely. I respect your ministry, wisdom, and walk with God. Thanks for the word for the hour! So powerful!

    Brent Wedding

    March 26, 2011 at 9:13 pm

  3. We have this treasure in earthen vessels. Various countries loan their treasured artifacts and museum pieces to other museums around the world. Those articles are placed in secure, glass enclosed display cases with armed guards placed at stratetgic locations nearby. Our Lord and Saviour has loaned his gift to this world displayed in earthen display cases. He expects us to surround this treasure with all of the safeguards and protection worthy of such an invaluable gift. I just wonder how He considers the flippant, careless and insolent manner with which many exhibit Him. Yes, these are perilous times and I am scared of the repercussions of the most powerful kingdom of all towards a pitiful creature from this kingdom who would blatantly disregard and have no fear of letting the treasured gift be stolen or defaced. The fear of God causes me to keep a watch over the gift. The treasure is a loan from a heavenly country and one of these days I will have to return it and if it is not returned with ceremony in the same condition it was loaned to me ….you’re right the idea scares me to death!!! Once I accepted the incredible opportunity to display this treasure, I was committed to post a guard about it at all costs. Even to the extent of dying to protect and preserve it in it’s original and pristine condition. I have no alternatives. What a signature honor that it’s displayed in my world. Awesome article.

    Elizabeth Herion

    March 27, 2011 at 12:09 am

  4. So very true. I have read The Book, and somebody is going to make it! I pray daily,Lord let it be me! I don’t aim to let down. This truth is worth fighting for. I’m thrilled to be one of His people. Loved the post. Don’t ever quit! Your such a blessing.

    Brenda Lawrence

    March 27, 2011 at 12:23 am

  5. Yes, it is so disheartening to hear of brothers and sisters who have made shipwreck of their lives this close to home! I’m scared too. The words of the old song come to me:
    Keep me true, Lord Jesus, keep me true.
    Keep me true, Lord Jesus, keep me true.
    There’s a race that I must run!
    There are victories to be won!
    By thy power every hour,
    Keep me true!
    That is the desire and prayer of my heart! Keep me true!

    Crystal Smith (Morris)

    March 27, 2011 at 1:10 am

  6. Thank you Bro. Ballestero for saying it so well, I am scared, and I will go on being scared…my desire is to make it HOME !

    Tina Hanson

    March 27, 2011 at 1:36 am

  7. Bro. Ballestero,

    This is tremendous: This is not a blog to relish and enjoy, however, it is one that everyone should appreciate!

    John Scheel

    March 27, 2011 at 5:25 pm

  8. There really are just too many these days that don’t have a good ole “Fear of the Lord”.

    Michel Heimoz

    March 30, 2011 at 9:27 am


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