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The Kiss Of Death

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The Kiss Of Death

“Remember Elizabeth? She just got a hearing implant to see if that would cure her deafness,” my wife said. We were eating lunch in Georgia, at a National Country Club.

“They call that, The Kiss Of Death, in the deaf community,” offered the court certified Interpreter for the deaf who was seated at the table with us.

The Kiss Of Death?” I was in shock! “Why would they call being able to hear, The Kiss Of Death?

“Hearing would ruin their life, as they know it. Many deaf people are very happy in their own world,” she said. “It’s a very tight-knit society.  Lip reading is a coveted gift. Most deaf people don’t want to be healed. They are happy being deaf.”

She related an incident about signing to a client. The client signed back to her that she could read lips and only wanted to be spoken to, not signed to by a hearing person. Although the court had certified the Interpreter, she was still an outsider to the deaf.

The Interpreter began to describe some of her client’s anti-hearing sentiments. She served several expectant mothers who were deaf. These moms-to-be wanted their babies to be deaf as well.

As a hearing person, I’ve had very limited communication with the deaf. If they can read my lips, that’s wonderful. I cannot read theirs. We can only write notes back and forth to each other. I cannot imagine anyone not wanting to hear.

I also have no way of knowing how accurate the Interpreter’s opinion was. She was only relating her life experiences.

Although my interaction with the natural deaf is somewhat limited, I am however, very familiar with the attitudes of the spiritually deaf.

The spiritually deaf that I know, don’t want to be healed. They resist getting a spiritual implant to hear the Word of the Lord. To them, that would be The Kiss Of Death!

Forty-two times the Bible uses the phrase, “He that hath an ear to hear.” Evidently, not everyone can hear what the Spirit saith. Their Pastor/Interpreter is an intrusion into their world.

They too do not wish to be healed and want all of their children to be deaf as well. The preached Word of God is something that the spiritually deaf person cannot hear. They can’t hear sermons about:

  • Doctrine
  • Tithes
  • Holiness
  • Separation from the world

It is really futile to try to communicate with those that are deaf to God’s Word. The interference of hearing people into their life is resented.

Jesus healed the deaf. We read about it in the Gospels. He is still able to heal the spiritually deaf today who want to be healed.

My father had been the pastor at a church for three years. A brother came up to him after the Saturday night service and complimented his sermon. Dad thanked him. Sunday morning the same man gave him another compliment.

Sunday night, the same brother came up to Dad and with tears in his eyes said, “Bro. Ballestero, I thank you for that message! That was the best I’ve ever heard! You saved me tonight!”

My father invited the man into his office. When they sat down, my father began his inquiry.

“Brother, for the last three years you’ve fought me tooth and toenail. You have resisted me at every turn. Not one time have you said a nice thing to me since I’ve been here. You have never complimented any of my messages before. Now, for three sermons in a row, you’ve bragged on me. What’s your game?”

The brother broke down and cried. He apologized to my Father. He said, “I am so sorry I’ve been like that to you Pastor. The reason I’ve complimented your preaching, is because I just got my ears open!”

All a Pastor can pray for is that his hearers will get their ears opened! He knows that for those who are content not to hear preaching, it is truly, The Kiss of Death!


The Last Thing You Lose Is Your Hearing

Bro. Henry Baskins fell like he’d been shot. The sound of his head hitting the floor was enough to make those nearby sick and alarmed. His fellow workers called 911 and anxiously watched for the ambulance.

Within minutes, my phone rang and informed me that one of the most precious men in the Kingdom of God was in a coma and being taken from the ER to ICU. My heart sank. Bro. Baskins was near retirement age. No one had an answer why he had passed out on the job. He’d had no previous health concerns.

Henry Baskins

He was a church favorite. Even though he drove over 20 miles each way to church, he was always an hour or so early. He had been an usher as long as I could remember. His pockets always contained a bag of candy for the children. That made him a very popular man after church.

Sis. Baskins lived a pampered life. He waited on her hand and foot, did the grocery shopping, chauffeured her anywhere she wanted to go. What if he died? What would happen to her? She’d never even driven a car!

After calling the Prayer Chain in our church, I rushed to the Osteopathic Hospital. As I headed for ICU, I noticed family and saints were gathering too. There was a waiting room next to the ICU door.

No one, not even family was allowed to go in and see him yet. I told the folks in the waiting room to pray for Bro. Baskins. They prayed Pentecostal style.

I pushed the call button and announced myself. The nurse buzzed me in. She escorted me to Bro. Baskins’ room. My heart sank when I saw him. There were more tubes connected to him than I’d ever seen. There were tubes down his throat, up his nose, in his chest, his arms, his hands and his leg. It seemed like there were 10 monitors going. The pumping sounds of the machine doing the breathing for him were hard to ignore. He looked hopeless.

Even though he was unconscious, I announced myself to him. I said, “Bro. Baskins, this is Bro. Ballestero and I am here to pray for you.

My prayer was probably only a minute or so. I felt guilty being the only one allowed back in his room. I really didn’t want to leave even though my prayer was over.

My Dad had always said that the last thing we lose is our hearing, naturally and spiritually. I remembered that and began to talk.

I said, “Bro. Baskins, no one knows what happened at work today. Those close to you said you just fell over and hit your head. You have been in a coma ever since. The ambulance brought you to the Osteopathic Hospital.

“The doctors are trying to find out what the cause of the problem is. They don’t know. No one but me is allowed back here right now. So, don’t worry about your family not coming in, because the nurses are being very protective of you right now.

“Your wife is in the next room. All of her needs are being taken care of. Your children are here. The saints have filled up the ICU waiting room and I have the Prayer Chain praying for you.

“When they start letting family come in here, it will only be once every 4 hours and then, just for a few minutes. Now don’t worry about anything. You just focus on getting well, we’ll keep praying. I love you!”

Every time I went to see him, I prayed, and then I chattered. I told him of the news in the church. I talked about his family. Reassured him of his wife’s comfort. Every day for about 3 weeks I visited his room.

One Friday, he woke up. They checked him over and checked him out. When I heard the news that he was home and walking around. I rejoiced! This was awesome news.

Sunday morning when I stepped into the auditorium, there was Bro. Baskins standing at his usual ushering post. He hugged my neck and tears came into his eyes.

“Bro. Ballestero, when you came into my room and prayed for me and talked to me, I heard every word you said. Thank you, Thank you!” He said.

He could still hear! Unbelievable! Even when he was in such bad shape!

Dad’s words again echoed through my memory. “The last thing you lose is your hearing, naturally and spiritually.”

Can you still hear?

If You Can Hear, It’s Not The Kiss Of Death,  It’s The Kiss Of Life…  Spiritual Life!



Written by Martyn Ballestero

March 22, 2018 at 7:33 pm

“Thanks, Dad! I got it for myself!”

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The Apostolic Tabernacle, located 905 S. Pike Street in Shelbyville, Indiana, was celebrating its anniversary. Bro. Carl Ballestero had just finished teaching the afternoon Bible Study. The service ended in prayer, and then the crowd was dismissed. Bro. Cavaness promised to feed his guests a BBQ feast and the crowd showed their excitement to go eat. Well, all except one teenager.

The dark-haired young man looked for a side room or a place to hide until the church emptied. He hoped that no one would miss him or come looking for him. He didn’t want to be seen by anyone right now. He couldn’t find a classroom.

Without anyone noticing, he slipped through a door that led him to the baptismal tank area. There, he bent over so as to remain unseen and moved to the side of the tank and laid down on the bare floor, flat on his back. He closed his eyes and waited. It seemed like forever before the sounds of conversations to died out and then he heard the front door close. He listened for any sounds of footsteps, but all was quiet. That’s when it started.

The boy began to cry, when I say cry, I don’t mean that there was a tear or two. I mean he began to sob. He wanted the same experience with God that his parents had. He felt shallow, empty, and unfulfilled. He wanted more of God. The sobs turned into groans and heartfelt travail. Time wasn’t important, food wasn’t important, getting something from God at that moment was all that mattered now.

Most of the afternoon the young prayed. His eyes were almost swollen shut. Some hours later, as folks gathered in for the evening service, he slipped out of the baptistery and into the Men’s room to comb his hair and wash his face. No one seemed to notice his earlier absence. His parents never mentioned it.

The young man became a pastor and many years later he invited Bro. Roger Evens to preach for him. One day, Bro. Evens said, “Do you remember the day at Shelbyville that you prayed behind the baptistery and didn’t go eat with everyone else?

The young pastor’s mouth dropped open. “How do you know about that?” he asked.

“I was there,” Bro. Evens said. “I came back into the church with your dad looking for you and making sure you had a way to go eat. That’s when we heard you crying out to God. I told you dad to go pray with you because I couldn’t go eat knowing you were crying like that.”

“Your dad said, ‘No, I can’t go pray for him.”

“Why not?” I said.

“Like a baby chick getting out of its shell, it has to do that by its self! If he doesn’t get this for himself he will never amount to a hill of beans.”

“With tears in your dad’s eyes and in mine, we walked out of the church that day.”



Fifty-five years later, all I can say now is, “Thanks, Dad! I got it for myself!”

Written by Martyn Ballestero

March 19, 2018 at 1:55 pm

So, When Do The Servers Eat?

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So, When Do The Servers Eat?





 Imagine Being In A Restaurant.

In the restaurant, we eat and enjoy our wonderful meal. We love being pampered and catered to. We are made to completely enjoy the experience… because of the servers. But, when do they ever get to eat? They just stay busy serving.


 Imagine Being In Church.

  • In church, we enjoy the worship,
  • We enjoy the song service,
  • We enjoy the talented musicians,


  • We enjoy the multimedia,
  • We enjoy the songs and scriptures up on the big screen,
  • And, we enjoy the clear crisp sound of every amplified voice.


  • We are made to completely enjoy the experience… because of the servers.
  • But when do they get to eat?
  • They are so busy serving us that they don’t stop to eat when everyone else eats.


 When Do The Musicians Get To Sing?

  • How long do they have to go without worship?
  • How long can their spiritual man survive without food?


 How About The People In The Sound Booth?

  • Do those involved in multimedia ever get a chance to get blessed?
  • Are they restricted from raising their hands?
  • Are they so techie and committed to media and sound excellence, that there is no room for worship?
  • Is it improper for them to say, ‘Amen” while in the sound booth?


 What About The Preachers On The Platform?


 When Do The Servers In God’s House Get To Eat What Everyone Else Gets To Eat?

  • How long can you go without a blessing?
  • How long?
  • Has anyone noticed that worship from many of our musicians, multimedia/sound techs, and most of the platform is almost non-existent?


Haven’t they heard that worship is everyone’s business?

  • Worship is everyone’s duty!
  • Worship is everyone’s privilege!
  • No one is exempt!


It would almost appear, that those who have chosen to be in the sound booth and stay there without any response to worship, prayer, or to the preaching… are not showing any signs of a spiritual life.

One might think they have more knowledge of technical stuff in their heads than they have knowledge of God in their hearts.

How can you play an instrument unto the Lord, and you feel anything?

How can you as a minister request the saints to really worship the Lord, and yet you don’t set the example?


If David the King, could take off his golden crown and dance before the ark, why can’t we all take off the golden crown that represents our little office, and dance like David?

  • Am I being harsh, or unfair? No doubt. (I won’t even defend myself.)
  • I am a preacher. When do I get to partake and enjoy a worship service? (I’ve got to eat too!)
  • I am a musician. When do I get to lay my guitar down? When do I get to shout? (I’ve got to eat too!)


I am somewhat of a nerd. I’ve installed sound equipment and set up computers in a number of churches and ran their multimedia for them. When do I get to come out of the sound booth and praise the Lord? (I’ve got to eat too!)

  • Never let your office or job put you in a position to stop rejoicing in the Lord.
  • Never think worship and responding to His presence is beneath you.
  • Never stop responding to preaching, no matter where you are seated in the church.


Is it just the carnal people who volunteer run the multimedia? Or do worshippers still exist back there too?

Is it the mindset of musicians to stay so focused on showcasing their talent that… that’s all it is? Or do worshippers still exist up there too?

Is it the attitude of ministry that they are so deep into the Word, that any demonstration is beneath them? Or do worshippers still exist there too?


I have no answers.

I only have one question.


When Do The Servers Eat?



Written by Martyn Ballestero

February 28, 2018 at 1:10 pm

She’s A Woman In Love!

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She’s A Woman In Love!


Everyone can tell she’s in love, because of how she acts around him.

They also can tell she’s in love by how she acts when she’s by herself.

Even strangers can look at her, when she’s with him, and see that she’s in love.


Her every thought is consumed with thinking about him and them.

She is affectionate with her words to him.

She is affectionate with him.


She constantly does little things for him so he will know she was thinking about him.

She always makes herself available to be with him.

She constantly stays in touch and quickly responds when he communicates with her.


She never ignores him.

She never stops telling him that she loves him.

She brings him gifts.


She looks lovingly at every picture she has of him.

She reads and rereads his every letter to her, looking for some possible hidden sweetness.

She dresses to please him and imagines his reaction of approval to her outfit.


She smiles all the time.

She’s never been happier.

She is happier than anyone has ever seen her.


She is always willing to go wherever he suggests.

She can’t wait for his call.

She knows her response will always be yes.


She feels secure in his love and trusts his every word.

She believes he will always do the right thing for her and protect her.

She sings love songs just for him.


She is quick to cry and say she’s sorry when she feels she has done something to displease him.

She writes love poems to him.

She feels her heart melt when he comes close to her.


She looks at no one else.

She thinks of no one else.

She talks of no one else.


She knows her heart is fixed on him and refuses to let anything change that.

She lets him plan her life.

She loves going to his house.


She chooses to love his family too.

She tells all her friends about him.

She brags on him to everyone who will listen.


She is not ashamed of him.

She is proud to be called his.

She can’t wait until they get married.


She dreams and plans for that day.

She counts the days.

She’s a woman in love!



If This Is A Picture Of A Woman In Love, Then Read On…

Because the Acts 2:38 church is the bride of Christ…  then isn’t this how His bride-to-be should act?

Shouldn’t His Bride Act Like A Woman In Love?



 Everyone can tell she’s in love, because of how she acts around Him.

They also can tell she’s in love by how she acts when she’s by herself.

Even strangers can look at her, when she’s with Him, and see that she’s in love.


Her every thought is consumed with thinking about Him and them.

She is affectionate with her words to Him.

She is affectionate with Him.


She constantly does little things for Him so He will know she was thinking about Him.

She always makes herself available to be with Him.

She constantly stays in touch and quickly responds when He communicates with her.


She never ignores Him.

She never stops telling Him that she loves Him.

She brings Him gifts.


She looks lovingly at every picture she has of Him.

She reads and rereads His every letter to her, looking for some possible hidden sweetness.

She dresses to please Him and imagines His reaction of approval to her outfit.


She smiles all the time.

She’s never been happier.

She is happier than anyone has ever seen her.


She is always willing to go wherever He suggests.

She can’t wait for His call.

She knows her response will always be yes.


She feels secure in His love and trusts His every word.

She believes He will always do the right thing for her and protect her.

She sings love songs just for Him.


She is quick to cry and say she’s sorry when she feels she has done something to displease Him.

She writes love poems to Him.

She feels her heart melt when He comes close to her.


She looks at no one else.

She thinks of no one else.

She talks of no one else.


She knows her heart is fixed on Him and refuses to let anything change that.

She lets Him plan her life.

She loves going to His House.


She chooses to love His family too.

She tells all her friends about Him.

She brags on Him to everyone who will listen.


She is not ashamed of Him.

She is proud to be called His.

She can’t wait until they get married.


She dreams and plans for that day.

She counts the days.

She’s a woman in love!


As a Holy Ghost filled, Pentecostal Apostolic, can the world see that you are really in love with Jesus?



Written by Martyn Ballestero

February 10, 2018 at 9:18 pm

My Old Man Is Crazy!

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My Old Man Is Crazy!


I’m not saying he’s bipolar.

I’m not saying he has schizophrenia.

I’m not saying he should be in an institution or that he’s stupid.

I’m just saying he’s crazy. He’s very smart, yet he’s really crazy.


My old man’s not right.

I hate him too.

He embarrasses me in front of my friends.

When you tell him how horrible he is, he agrees but doesn’t change.


He even makes me cry sometimes.

He has hurt me so bad that I was embarrassed to tell even my closest friends.

I hate to say this, but I really don’t even like him.

I’ve even told him that I don’t love him and I never will.


My Old Man Is Crazy!


He does stupid and random stuff that truly scares me.

I am ashamed for him to be around me.

He lives in denial and keeps justifying all his craziness.

He likes things he shouldn’t.


He really needs help, but no one can help him.

He’s read up on his condition and says he knows what he needs to do.

But, I don’t think he is making any progress.

He really needs to stop and consider his horrible actions.


My old man is not loved by anyone.

His craziness pushes everyone away.

They all roll their eyes when he shows up.

His so-called friends just shake their heads in dismay and disappointment.


My Old Man Is Crazy!


He does things he shouldn’t.

He says things he shouldn’t.

He is very good at rationalizing and justifying himself.

He’s crazy, I’m telling you.


Some would like to see him dead.

I know some would even come to his funeral just to make sure he was really dead.

He’s just that bad.

He is so bad that God doesn’t like him.


I hate everything about him.

He’s horrible.

I loathe him.

He’ll never change.


My Old Man Is Crazy!


No self-help book has a remedy for him.

No prescription can help.

Therapists can’t fix him

Warnings and threats don’t seem to work.


And it’s driving me crazy too.

I wish he was out of my life.

I can’t tell you how happy I would be just to know my old man is graveyard dead,

My old man is crazy.


I told him he is not welcome in my house.

I told him to leave my family alone.

I told him that I cannot allow his influences in my life.

I told him to go away, I never wanted to see him again.


My Old Man Is Crazy!


I told him I am sick and tired of putting up with his mess.

I want my old man to be forever gone.

Judge me if you must,

I want my old man dead.


My old man makes me cry.

His actions are corrupt.

His words are deceitful, and his life is a sham.

I hate everything he does.


He wants attention.

His life is all about him and no one else.

No one can tell him what to do.

He hates that.


My Old Man Is Crazy!


My old man was always there.

He was there when I was born.

He’s been there for every event of my life.

Good times or bad, he was there.


That’s not even a good thing.

He gets all up in my business.

He meddles in every area of my life.

He messes up some of the most wonderful moments of my life.


I got to the place I had to tell my old man he was going to have to die.

He resisted and argued loudly with me.

But I wouldn’t budge, or back down.

He said he wouldn’t die willingly.


My Old Man Is Crazy!


So, I told him to prepare to be buried alive.

I forced him to his knees and kept him there.

I reminded him of every horrible thing he had done to me and my family.

My old man said he felt so dirty and ashamed, but I wouldn’t stop.


He cried and asked for mercy and forgiveness.

That’s when my old man died.

I started smiling for the first time in years.

My old man was dead.


“What shall we do with him?” Someone asked.

“Bury him,” I said.

Several gathered around to help bury my old man.

The Preacher buried him in water in Jesus Name.


My Old Man Is Crazy!


I shouted all over the church when my old man died.

The heaviest weight of my life was lifted.

My friends and family rejoiced with me.

I even told my neighbors that my old man was dead, and I smiled a big smile.


My life became peaceful and serene when my old man died.

I put a marker on his grave.

For all the world to see.

“Here lies My Old Man… Flesh”


(You’re not going to believe this.)

Some days later, I got the shock of my life.

I wanted to scream in horror.

I almost died from fright.


My Old Man Is Crazy!


There standing at my door was my old man.

He just grinned and pushed his way in.

This can’t be happening!

This is unreal!


But there he stood anyway.

My family cringed in fear.

How could this be happening?

My old man was like some un-earthling who could come back alive.


My mother told about a man named Paul.

He had a similar problem with his old man,

And he had to make him die every day.

Every day? E-V-E-R-Y DAY? Oh, No!


My Old Man Is Crazy!


I took him to church.

I needed some help.

I couldn’t let him live in my house anymore.

He couldn’t move back in.


I told him to pray.

I told him to fast.

I told him to deny himself.

I told him I want him to die again.


He doesn’t make going to church a priority, he’s not faithful.

He won’t pray like he knows he needs to.

He doesn’t like the subject of tithes.

He doesn’t read his Bible.


My Old Man Is Crazy!


He’s a rebel.

He hates standards.

He hates preachers.

He makes fun of holiness


My Old Man Is Crazy!


He gets defensive when the preacher said corrective things to him.

Like a macabre nightmare, sometimes he seems dead, then comes right back alive again.

I wish he’d stay dead.


He’s so bad, even God even wants him dead.

The preacher is tired of him, too. He won’t stay dead.

Many preachers have tried to get him to change but without any success.

The church family has tried to tolerate him.

His whole family has about given up on him.


As long as my old man is alive, my life is spent in vain.

As long as my old man is alive, I’ll never be saved.

As long as my old man is alive, I’ll never please God.

As long as my old man is alive, my inheritance is at risk.


My Old Man Is Crazy!


So now it’s a daily routine.

When I wake up in the morning and start my day.

He’s sitting on the edge of my bed.

Very much alive.


My daily routine now includes the unimaginable.

I have to figure out a way to make my old man die every day.

It’s not always easy to do

But it must be done.


My crazy old man.

My flesh.

Must die.



My Old Man Is Crazy!






Joseph asked his brethren this question about his earthly father.

He called him, “the old man.”


Gen. 43:27 And he asked them of their welfare, and said, Is your father well, the old man of whom ye spake? Is he yet alive?


Today, I Ask This Question Of Your Flesh… Is Your Old Man Alive?


Eph. 4:22 That ye put off concerning the former conversation* the old man, which is corrupt according to the deceitful lusts;



Paul Said That His Old Man Had To Die Every Day.         1 Co 15:31

Is Your Old Man Still Alive?



Written by Martyn Ballestero

January 20, 2018 at 4:24 pm

All He Ever Wanted, Was Someone To Love Him

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All He Ever Wanted, Was Someone To Love Him

Proverbs 30:18 There be three things which are too wonderful for me, yea, four which I know not:

Proverbs 30:19 The way of an eagle in the air; the way of a serpent upon a rock; the way of a ship in the midst of the sea; and the way of a man with a maid.

All He Ever Wanted Was For Someone To Love Him.

He had it all.

Actually, He had everything.

Well, He had everything, except one thing.

He had no one to love Him.

He had Angels who praised Him continuously.

He had Angels who did His bidding without question.

But He had no one to love Him.

He had no one to dote on Him.

He had received honor before.

He had received praise before.

But He had never been loved before.

He had never seen love demonstrated.

He had never seen love displayed.

He had never seen love expressed or shown.

He had never seen romance before.

He understood things like physics, gravity, light, sound, space travel and how to make something out of nothing.

He understood emotions like rebellion, pride, and obedience.

He just wanted to know more about this thing called love.

He had always heard over 10,000 Hallelujahs at any given moment of every day.

He heard multitudes cry “Holy, Holy, Holy, Lord God Almighty” every day.

What He’d never heard was someone say, “I love you!”

He knew the journey to finding love would be very long.

He had seen twinkles in stars before, but never in an eye.

His plan already included man, Calvary, and the Church.

He was prepared to do whatever it took to get a bride.

He wanted to find someone to love Him.

He spoke and the heavens and the earth came into existence.

By His own words, the sun, moon, and stars were created and flung perfectly into space.

By His own voice, the light was created, flowers and trees sprung up.

He said the words, and fish, birds, and animals appeared.

He looked it all over and said. “That’s good.”

Then He stopped talking.

Adam And Eve

He knelt down on the ground and with His hands, he began to form someone He could love. He called the man, Adam. The woman was named Eve.

He loved them. He visited every day. They walked and talked together every day without distraction.

He watched Adam and Eve smile at one another. He saw how Adam responded to Eve’s touch and Eve to Adam’s.

He watched them hold hands and kiss.

He liked what He saw. He saw the twinkle in Adam’s eye. He saw romance in its purest form.

He tried to imagine a mere mortal loving Him.

His mind raced ahead thousands of years. He thought of Himself and the Church. He pondered about His bride-to-be. “So… this is what it’s going to be like to be in love!”

He’d never been in love before. He saw Adam and Eve enjoying each other’s company. He told Himself, “That’s the kind of love I want. That’s the kind of romance I want.”

He so enjoyed being with Adam and Eve, that He turned His attention from the sounds of “Hallelujah” and “Holy-Holy” for a few hours every day just to come and see them.

He had no competition in the love department on earth. Maybe they would fall in love with Him.

Then came the heart-wrenching day when the evil serpent beguiled Eve. Sin, the enemy of the Most Holy One entered the picture. Paradise was no more.

Pain, sorrow, shame, and regret now entered the picture. The hope of Adam and Eve continuing their relationship with Him was over. Sin did it’s best to destroy that relationship.

They chose to listen to the voice of His enemy rather than listen to His voice.

All He Ever Wanted Was For Someone To Love Him.


Seven generations later, a man was born by the name of Enoch. He heard his father and grandfather talk about Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden. He heard the stories about God walking with them in the cool of the day.

Enoch began to imagine what it would be like to have God for a friend. That seemed to be all he could think about.

He inquired often of his family, asking them many questions, hoping to hear more stories about those precious days. He even got to talk to Adam himself and listened intently. He dreamed of having a similar experience with God.

One day Enoch started calling on the Lord as he walked. He began talking to God as if He was beside him.  The Lord did appear beside him and they began walking together and talking together every day.

Enoch was perfect in God’s eyes. His love thrilled the Lord. This was true love. Here was someone who chose to love Him, who took time out of their day and focused only on Him.

They walked and talked together every day for years. Then one day while they were walking, the sun started going down.

The Lord noticed it too. He also knew it was a long way back to Enoch’s house. So He said, “Enoch, it’s closer to my house than it is to yours. Why don’t you come on home with me?” Enoch said, “Yes.”

“And Enoch was not, for the Lord took him.”

All He Ever Wanted Was For Someone To Love Him.


He looked the world over and His eyes fell upon her. He could really love her. Her father was a Hittite and her mother was an Amorite. But He didn’t hold that against her.

He stood there looking at her, watching her. She was beautiful to Him.

She had no family, no one to look after her. There was no one else that loved her.

She was unwanted and unloved by everyone else in the world.  She was considered second class and discarded by those who knew her.

  • She wasn’t beautiful, but He loved her.
  • She wasn’t rich, but He loved her.
  • She wasn’t mighty, but He loved her.
  • She wasn’t even faithful, but He loved her.

He, the King of Kings, the Lord of Lords, the First and the Last, The Lord God Almighty tried vainly to woo her. He did everything He could to show her He could supply her every need.

He was the richest Man in the world and of all the people in the world; He chose her, the poorest of all. He alone could make her prosper. She wasn’t impressed for long.

He showed her things about Himself that no one else had ever known. He gave her some names she could call Him by that would reveal His protecting love for her.

  • Jehovah Jireh – The Lord will Provide.
  • Jehovah Rapha – The Lord our Healer.
  • Jehovah Nissi – The Lord our Banner
  • Jehovah Shalom – The Lord our Peace
  • Jehovah Raah – The Lord our Shepherd
  • Jehovah Tsidkenu – The Lord our Righteousness
  • Jehovah Shammah – The Lord is Present

When she got sick, He made sure she got well. When she was hungry, He provided food for her and took care of her every need.

He loved her, and yet she wasn’t happy with Him. Her heart easily turned aside. She often looked at others the way He wished she would look at Him. It grieved Him continually.

While still on their honeymoon, problems arose. They hadn’t been gone from Egypt a month and things turned ugly. Before He could even get her to the Promised Land and the home He had given her, she showed her unhappiness.

He talked with Moses about His plans for her and gave him detailed instructions.

But before Moses could talk to her she started looking at someone else. She began to dress to please them. She brazenly displayed her disdain for His wishes.

  • She murmured.
  • She complained.
  • She rebelled.
  • She flaunted herself in front of others.
  • She became brazen.
  • She couldn’t even blush.

It broke His heart. Yet He fought for her when everyone tried to kill her. He supplied her every need. He cared for her more than she cared for Him.

He still loved her. He sent her letters, but she ignored them. Even after she got settled in her new home, she started looking for other lovers.

She played the harlot and was unfaithful to Him. She only dressed to please Him if she was in the mood. She often saw others that attracted her and she dressed and displayed herself in a way to please them. She longed for their affections, not His.

All He Ever Wanted Was For Someone To Love Him.


No one seemed to care how He felt. He had no one to share His pain and problems with.

In His Divine Heartache, He looked upon His prophet, Hosea. Hosea was unmarried.

He told Hosea to marry a woman who stood on the street corners at night. “Just go pick a prostitute, anyone will do.”

He wanted someone to feel like He felt, every day.

He wanted to see again how mere mortals handled rejection from those they loved.

Hosea found such a girl. Her name was Gomer. Everyone in town knew Hosea. They were shocked at his choice of a wife. In their minds she was trash.

  • She had dirtied herself.
  • She had lowered herself.
  • She had ruined her name.
  • She would destroy their marriage.
  • Of all the girls, why pick her?

The romance burned brightly and then quickly faded. The Lord watched how their love life went.

He watched Gomer sweeten his coffee with her kisses and then walk out the door disappearing for long periods of time.

Then came the babies. Their very names carried not only a prophecy to Israel but also a wake-up call to Hosea about his two-timing wife.

Jezreel, “God will disperse”

Lo-ruhamah, “Not pitied, or No Mercy”

Lo-ammi, “Not my people”

Hosea could tell by the names he named his children that he was not their father.

Gomer eventually got so involved in her wild lifestyle that she was overpowered and put into slavery by one of her lovers. She later was placed on an auction block and sold like a farm animal.

Hosea got word that his wife was being sold. He knew what she was and what she had done. But he loved her in spite of it all.

Anyone can tell by what he paid for her, that he gave all the money he had and emptied out his meager pantry besides. He gave his all to buy her back. He paid fifteen pieces of silver, and 1½ homers of barley.

All He Ever Wanted Was For Someone To Love Him.

The Lord watched as Hosea gave all he had to buy his unfaithful wife back.

He turned his attention again to Israel. She wasn’t on an auction block. She wasn’t held against her will. She was happy to be unfaithful.

So He wrote her a bill of divorcement and He didn’t talk to her for 400 years.

All He Ever Wanted Was For Someone To Love Him.


One day, He finally stepped into His closet and clothed Himself in a robe of flesh. He was born in Bethlehem to a young virgin.

He chose not to arrive in splendor, so He came to earth in obscurity. He came as God manifested in the flesh. He walked almost unnoticed around her.

He didn’t make Himself handsome so that she would love Him for His good looks. He wanted her to love Him for who He was, not what He looked like.

But He came unto His own and His own received Him not. They didn’t believe Him.

  • He wept.
  • His love was everlasting. Her love was fickle.
  • She tried to find fault with Him. She only followed Him for what He could give them.
  • He wanted to talk.
  • She was too busy, too preoccupied.

He said to her, “You say you love Me, but you say that only with your lips. It’s just words. Your heart is far from Me. You don’t love Me with your heart.”

He saw her as she really was. A slave. She was in bondage and held fast by her own sins.

He knew He was the only One who could redeem her.

He willingly offered Himself on Calvary for Her. He willingly gave His all to buy her back. He gave His blood to wash away her sins and He arose on the third day to give her hope of a new life.

All He Ever Wanted Was For Someone To Love Him.

The Church

Over 2,000 years have come and gone. He’s ready now to take His bride to a home He has prepared just for her.

He wanted someone who would love Him enough to heed all of His Word. After all, if she really loved Him, she would keep His commandments. Not pick and choose which ones she liked. He was in love, why wasn’t she?

Yet He sees her still looking at the world. Sometimes she tries harder to please her other lovers than she does Him.

She has started complaining again if she thinks He’s asking her to dress a certain way just for Him. She doesn’t always act like she is in love with Him.

She says, “He doesn’t care how I dress. He doesn’t look on the outside. He only looks on the inside, on the heart.”

But when He looked in her heart, He saw nothing there that looked like love to Him. She doesn’t act like she is in love with Him.

  • She dreads talking to Him on a daily basis. She doesn’t act like she is in love with Him.
  • She doesn’t think about Him during the course of the day. She doesn’t act like she is in love with Him.
  • Yet she talks freely to everyone else but Him. She doesn’t act like she is in love with Him.
  • All she seems to want is a sugar daddy. She doesn’t act like she is in love with Him.
  • She has to be begged to visit His house. She doesn’t act like she is in love with Him.
  • He blesses her with money and yet she is not faithful to give her tithe to Him. She doesn’t act like she is in love with Him.
  • He sends blessings her way and loads her down daily with benefits. She soon forgets. She doesn’t act like she is in love with Him.
  • He sends healing to her every situation. She doesn’t act like she is in love with Him.
  • He calms her storms of life. She doesn’t act like she is in love with Him.
  • She has all the songs memorized and sings them without feeling. She doesn’t act like she is in love with Him.
  • She hears His Word preached and chooses which parts she likes and doesn’t like. She doesn’t act like she is in love with Him.
  • He says He’s coming to get her and she’s not even looking out the window for Him. She doesn’t act like she is in love with Him.
  • He says He is coming to get and to take her to heaven with Him, and she is not even making herself ready. She doesn’t act like she is in love with Him.
  • He knew it would happen this way.
  • A long time ago He said that she would love pleasure more than she loved Him.
  • He said that her love would wax cold.
  • He said she would leave her 1st love.
  • And He was right.

All He Ever Wanted Was For Someone To Love Him.


  • Do you love Him? I mean, do you really love Him? Do you love Him with all of your heart? He wants to know.
  • He wants to know if you love another. Do you?
  • He wants to know if your heart belongs only to Him or not. Does it?
  • He’s looking for a bride that will love Him with all of her heart, her soul her mind, and her strength.
  • Could that person be you? He’s looking your way right now. He wants it to be you.

All He Ever Wanted Was For Someone To Love Him.

Written by Martyn Ballestero

January 15, 2018 at 6:12 pm

She Put Her Gum In The Offering Plate!

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She Put Her Gum In The Offering Plate!

Agnes was mad, she was really mad! She had long ago gotten past being upset. She was irritated by what was happening in her world. Her world was out of control. This was not the life she had planned for herself.

Her family was by far the richest in her hometown of Bolivar, Missouri. They owned the entire town. Well, at least most of it was theirs. Her maiden name of Burke was a name that was well-respected in Bolivar. It got respect because it carried most of the money.

Everything had been wonderful in her world up till now. Her husband Bill was not rich nor did he come from a moneyed family like hers, but he wasn’t afraid of hard work and was a good provider. They loved each other. They had recently moved to the Riverside, California area.

When Agnes found out that Bill had somehow wandered into one of those Pentecostal Holy Roller churches, she was mortified. They were good Baptist people from a long line of Baptists. This should not be happening.

When Bill came home from the little Pentecostal church, he was acting differently. He said he’d gotten the Holy Ghost and had talked in tongues.

Agnes was not happy and went through the roof. She argued. She ranted. She raved. This was unbelievable and totally unacceptable! She had to find a way to get Bill back on track and away from all of them low-class Holy Rollers.

She finally decided to go to the little church with Bill and see if she could fix the mess Bill had just gotten them into.

The ladies looked horrible to her with their long hair, long dresses, and long sleeves. The women had their hair all done up. They looked old-fashioned and out of date. Agnes knew she would never fit into a church like this one. All of the women in the church dressed that way. Agnes refused to comply. She was determined to show her disdain for their manner of dress. She was determined to never be part of something so ridiculous.

She seldom missed a service, however. Her attendance was not because she was interested. She wasn’t. She despised everything about this new religion of Bills. Somehow, she had to get him away from this craziness.

To express her disdain for the ‘holiness’ dress code of the holy rollers, she wore things she knew they would disapprove of. She wore sleeveless dresses to church. She wore slacks. She even wore mini-skirts just to get a reaction from them.

She hated everything about these holy rollers. She criticized Bill’s involvement. She made his life a hell, at home.

At church, Agnes purposely didn’t smile much. She just sat there and chewed her gum. She always did. She knew that chewing gum in a church was considered disrespectful, but what did she care. When the offering was being received, Agnes would take her gum out and press it into the dollar bills in the plate.

She was pleased to watch the church secretary try to separate the gum from the paper dollars. It was one of the few things she enjoyed about going to this church.

Her husband Bill had laid on the floor, she found out, when he was praying to receive the ‘Holy Ghost,’ or whatever it was called. He evidently thrashed around quite a bit and rolled back and forth so much that the Pastor, Carl Ballestero, actually sat on him to hold him still so he could receive the Holy Ghost. How stupid, she thought. For six months now, Agnes had constantly shown her disdain and disrespect for the Pentecostals.

One night, a visitor came. The visitor was an old woman who had been in the original Azusa Street Mission. The presence of the Lord fell and people began to worship, but not Agnes. The old lady came to where Agnes was standing and even though she refused to pray, the old sister began to minister to her. In a few moments, she laid her hands on Agnes and prayed. God immediately filled her with the Holy Ghost.

She soon dropped to her knees, and then fell on the floor talking in tongues. She rolled. She rolled down the aisle. She rolled up under the piano and lay there for two hours, talking in tongues. She couldn’t stop.

Bill took his wife home drunk in the Holy Ghost that night. She went to sleep still talking in tongues. At 3 am, Agnes got out of bed and went next door to her neighbors, and beat on the door.

The neighbor lady said, ‘Agnes, what are you doing beating on my door at 3 am? Is something wrong? Do you need something?” All Agnes could do was speak in tongues. She gave up and went back to her house. She spoke in tongues for three days straight.

In time, God called Bill to preach the Gospel. A transformed Agnes and her husband, Bill (Wild Bill) Yandris, went to Merced, California and built a beautiful church to the glory of God. The Apostolic Tabernacle.

Bro. & Sis. Bill Yandris

The very godly Sister Agnes Yandris and her beloved Bill, have now both gone home to their glorious reward. Their children are carrying on this glorious message!

Written by Martyn Ballestero

January 11, 2018 at 11:22 am