The Ballestero Blog

Stupid Men With Smart Wives

How does that happen? It’s not all that uncommon today to see a stupid man with a smart wife. It makes everyone wonder about how they met and what was the attraction.

If she is so smart, why did she marry him? Did he con her? Did he keep his real self hidden from view until he married? Was she blinded by love?

Evidently, too many men have turned out to be, or act stupid after their marriage. If the wife had known how stupid he really was when they were courting, she quite possible would have never looked at him twice let alone married him.

I can even name a couple pretty stupid men in the Bible that were married to smart wives.

But, Let Me Just Focus On One, A Man Named Who Was Actually Named ‘Stupid’.

That’s Right, There Once Was A Man Named Stupid.

• That’s what his mama named him.
• He was called Nabal.
• Nabal = ‘Fool, Senseless’ (Hitchcock’s Dictionary of Bible Names)
• When it came to stupid, Nabal’s mama made sure he got to sit at the head of the class.
• He turned out to be the name they called him.

Nabal

He Was A Very Great Man, But He Was Also The Ultimate Senseless Fool.

1 Sam. 25:2 And there was a man in Maon, whose possessions were in Carmel; and the man was very great, and he had three thousand sheep, and a thousand goats: and he was shearing his sheep in Carmel.

• He was considered great because of what he had going on for himself.
• He had local respect and recognition.
• He had great means.
• He had a wonderful wife.

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Nabal Didn’t Fear God Nor Man

• Nabal was rich but he was also harsh and evil in his dealings. (1 Sam. 25:3).
• He didn’t care about helping others.
• He was focused on building his own kingdom, not helping God’s or anyone else’s.

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1 Sam. 25:3 Now the name of the man was Nabal; and the name of his wife Abigail: and she was a woman of good understanding, and of a beautiful countenance: but the man was churlish and evil in his doings; and he was of the house of Caleb.

• She was Smart.
• She was Beautiful.
• She was Unappreciated.
• She was Ignored.
• He was Evil.
• He was Wicked
• But he came from a great family… Caleb’s
• A goodly heritage and background evidently is not enough. He was still stupid in his actions.
• He was Churlish – (rude, mean-spirited, discourteous, uncivil, impolite).
• He didn’t deserve his wonderful wife.
• Abigail was the very image of beauty, wisdom and grace.

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No One Could Talk To Him

• He was Mr. Macho.
• He refused to listen to his wife or anyone else.
• Stupid men view their wives as inferior.
• Sometimes that attitude erupts in anger, irrational behavior and even violence.
• A man couldn’t speak to him. 1Sam 25:17
• No one could reason with him.
• He was always right, everyone else was wrong.
• Nabal never got delivered from his nature.

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Abigail

• Abigail is described as “intelligent” and she is praised in 1Sam 25:33 because of her discernment.
• But Nabal never benefited from his wife’s wisdom.
• They were never a team in his mind.
• She even stopped David and his men from attacking Nabal and killing him.
• She fell on the ground before David to apologize for her husband and beg for mercy.
• David listened to Abigail.
• Abigail described her husband in a very sad way when she made her plea.
• 1Sam 25:25 Let not my lord, I pray thee, regard this man of Belial, even Nabal: for as his name is, so is he; Nabal is his name, and folly is with him:
• She said: “Please disregard my worthless husband, Nabal, is his name and it means foolish. That’s what he is.

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Abigail Saved Nabal’s Life

• He refused to even feed the hungry men that were with David. All they had asked for a piece of bread.
• He ordered them off of his property.
• When Abigail heard what happened, she immediately went to David’s camp and apologized.
• Abigail’s actions are the only thing kept David from slaughtering Nabal and his men.
• When she got home she wanted to tell her husband what she had just done but he was too drunk to talk to anyone.
• She had to wait till he sobered up the next morning, before she could speak to him.

Nabal Heart Died Within Him

1 Sam. 25:37 But it came to pass in the morning, when the wine was gone out of Nabal, and his wife had told him these things, that his heart died within him, and he became as a stone.

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Some Kinds Of Stupid, No One Can Fix. That’s When God Stepped In.

1 Sam. 25:38 And it came to pass about ten days after, that the Lord smote Nabal, that he died.

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Can Anyone Fix Stupid?

I Don’t Know For Sure.

Here’s How I Would Try To Fix Stupid In My Life.

1. Rekindle The Fear Of The Lord In My Life.

Prov 9:10 The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom: and the knowledge of the holy is understanding.

2. Repent – Turn Around.

3. Be a Man That Someone Can Talk To. Whether Pastor, Friend or Wife. Be Approachable.

4. Humble Myself Before God And Man… Including My Wife.

5. Admit I’m Wrong, Especially To My Wife And Family.

6. Willingly Take Godly Instruction. From The Bible, My Pastor, My Friends, And My Wife.

7. Never Let My Heart Die And Turn To Stone. (Because I Know What Happens In The Next Verse. That’s when God stepped in.)

So, if you ever see a stupid man with a smart and beautiful wife… pray for him, but pray more for her. She has a great big cross to bear in life.